Time to catch up:  You voted for them, Arizona!  Sen. Jon Kyl, Sen. John McCain and Pres. George Bush have taken the spotlight off of the Iraq War, at least temporarily, by crafting and supporting legislation to end the nation's illegal immigration problems.  The solution?  Why, make all 12 million of them legal, of course!  There are some stipulations, but the wildest one is that they would be required to learn English.  Hell!  We don't even require legal Americans to learn English!  Ebonics and other street slangs are more prevalent than proper English.  Don't believe it?  Just ax anybody!....The U.S. will continue to have severe political problems, as long as voters remain more concerned with candidates' personal lives and personalities, than with their political experiences and qualifications.  Voters would rather elect a positive role model, especially for their children, because they would rather not accept the responsibility themselves!....On May 26th, the town of Springerville(take U.S. 60 east, from Phoenix, to the 26 Bar Ranch) will celebrate the 100th anniversary of the birth of the late John Wayne!....Spin City revisited:  Tempe has the highest crime rate among Valley cities, but officials say that the data is misleading, because a high percentage of police reports are from visitors, and not from residents!....Don't be fooled into buying a smaller car, because reports may say that a Crash Test rating is superb.  Crash tests are typically performed at slower-than-traffic speeds, and into an immovable object.  While you may survive crashing into the rear of an idling truck, the prospects are slim when the truck is coming at you at the same speed(slow or not) that you are approaching the truck!....Arizona DUI laws are now some of the toughest in the nation.  Good thing, because it remains among the easiest for teen drivers to obtain alcohol!  Newly signed legislation requires all DUI-convicted drivers to have a breathalyzer interlock device installed in their vehicle.  Two things come to mind:  1)  Drive a different vehicle, if you are Hell-bent on drinking and driving.  2)  This will make for some exciting, new Redneck drinking games, and create a niche for 'Designated Breathers!'....Which Arizona zipcode has the most millionaires?  Glendale's 85308.  Soooo, you've been holding out on us, haven't you, Howie!