Az I See It....
Prologue: Don't sweat the petty stuff, and don't pet the sweaty stuff!
International: A powerful Irani Ayatollah has rejected the recent election results, causing furor among its leadership. Not to worry. He's recently come down wth a cold!....Chinese leaders have cracked-down on protesting malcontents, with hundreds having already been killed, vowing, "The beatings will continue until the morale improves!"....United Nations Sec.-Gen. Ban Ki-Moon has left Myanmar without being allowed to visit that government's opposition leader, Aung Kyi, who remains jailed! Just another example of the ineffectiveness of the U.N.'s accountability efforts against terrorism and injustice!....The G8 world leaders have pledged $15B in aid to poor countries, mostly for improving farmer's agricultural abilities. Remember - give a man a potato and he'll eat for a day. Open a McDonald's and he'll be able to eat inexpensively forever!
National: Girl Scouts of America will receive remuneration from Dairy Queen, for allowing the inclusion of Tagalongs cookie bits in the DQ Blizzard, fattening the wallets of each, while further expanding the waistlines of Americans!....Reports that Alaska Governor Sara Palin is quitting are erroneous, and grossly misleading. She has unequivocally stated that she is NOT quitting. She is simply not going to be Governor anymore, and essentially will soon be doing what Sens. John McCain and John Kyl have done for years, for Arizonans - NOTHING!....A man working at a Camden, NJ chocolate factory has died, after falling into a vat of melted chocolate. Co-workers described him as, 'just the sweetest man!'....The King of Pop, Michael Jackson, is dead. Long live the King!(Nope - he's still dead!)....The Little People of America have informed the FCC that the word 'midget' is akin to a racial slur. After the meeting, they scurried to attend a command performance by Don Rickles!....The National Institute of Health reports that the H1N1 Swine-flu vaccine will be ready for public distribution by mid-October, just in time for a suspected outbreak of the H2N2 Bovine virus!
State: Some New York public school teachers are incorporating gambling and statistics, in an effort to teach math, much the same as some Arizona teachers have incorporated sex-with-students, in an effort to teach science!
Epilogue: "At my age, I've seen it all, done it all, and heard it all. I just don't remember any of it!" - HM
International: A powerful Irani Ayatollah has rejected the recent election results, causing furor among its leadership. Not to worry. He's recently come down wth a cold!....Chinese leaders have cracked-down on protesting malcontents, with hundreds having already been killed, vowing, "The beatings will continue until the morale improves!"....United Nations Sec.-Gen. Ban Ki-Moon has left Myanmar without being allowed to visit that government's opposition leader, Aung Kyi, who remains jailed! Just another example of the ineffectiveness of the U.N.'s accountability efforts against terrorism and injustice!....The G8 world leaders have pledged $15B in aid to poor countries, mostly for improving farmer's agricultural abilities. Remember - give a man a potato and he'll eat for a day. Open a McDonald's and he'll be able to eat inexpensively forever!
National: Girl Scouts of America will receive remuneration from Dairy Queen, for allowing the inclusion of Tagalongs cookie bits in the DQ Blizzard, fattening the wallets of each, while further expanding the waistlines of Americans!....Reports that Alaska Governor Sara Palin is quitting are erroneous, and grossly misleading. She has unequivocally stated that she is NOT quitting. She is simply not going to be Governor anymore, and essentially will soon be doing what Sens. John McCain and John Kyl have done for years, for Arizonans - NOTHING!....A man working at a Camden, NJ chocolate factory has died, after falling into a vat of melted chocolate. Co-workers described him as, 'just the sweetest man!'....The King of Pop, Michael Jackson, is dead. Long live the King!(Nope - he's still dead!)....The Little People of America have informed the FCC that the word 'midget' is akin to a racial slur. After the meeting, they scurried to attend a command performance by Don Rickles!....The National Institute of Health reports that the H1N1 Swine-flu vaccine will be ready for public distribution by mid-October, just in time for a suspected outbreak of the H2N2 Bovine virus!
State: Some New York public school teachers are incorporating gambling and statistics, in an effort to teach math, much the same as some Arizona teachers have incorporated sex-with-students, in an effort to teach science!
Epilogue: "At my age, I've seen it all, done it all, and heard it all. I just don't remember any of it!" - HM
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